Toxic people want you to feel sorry for them, and responsible for what happens to them.
Jodie Gale, life coach and psychotherapist, explained:
“Often the person is deeply wounded and for whatever reason, they are not yet able to take responsibility for their wounding, their feelings, their needs and their subsequent problems in life.”
Christine Porath, associate professor at Georgetown University, said:
”Toxic people not only harm others emotionally, but they’re also a threat to health.”
List Of 15 Traits of Highly Toxic People:
#1 They Know Your Weaknesses & Use Them
Toxic people come to know your weaknesses and will typically use that knowledge against you.
If you are worried about your partner cheating on you, they will definitely mention it in an intimidating manner when they themselves feel in a weaker spot.
#2 They Insult Others
Toxic people are rude and abrasive by nature. All true friends can feel comfortable messing with each other by poking fun innocuously, however, toxic people go way overboard with insults and jabs.
They do this in social situations to establish a sense of dominance and inconspicuously undermine others.
They never got over that high-school mentality, where it was cool or amusing to make fun of others and make them feel small by using nothing but their words.
#3 They Are Regularly Playing The Victim
If you feel like your friend is constantly exaggerating their level of emotional or physical discomfort, this may be a sign of a toxic person.
Additionally, a toxic person may play the victim to try to induce a sense of protectiveness or feelings of guilt in you to twist the situation in their favor.
#4 They Act Entitled and Superior
If your friend demands or expects special treatment it is a sign of controlling behavior.
In addition, this person may use sarcasm when speaking with you, and she might act as if she is smarter, knows best, and is always right.
Typically, toxic friends talk down to you or are rude or condescending.
They may even tell you that your opinions don’t make sense or are stupid.
In general, a toxic friend will insinuate that you are inferior to her in some way.
#5 They Act As If Rules Don’t Apply To Them
A toxic person frequently acts as if rules don’t apply to them.
They act as if they are far too important for them to have to abide by the rules of other people.
If your partner or friend usually pushes ahead of others in a public setting, cuts lines, or disregards others around them in general, you might be in a relationship with a toxic person.
#6 They Undermine Your Faith In Your Grasp Of Reality
Toxic people are incredibly skilled liars. They insist an incident didn’t happen when it did, and they insist they said or did something when they didn’t.
But, the problem is they’re so good at it that you end up questioning your own sanity.
Furthermore, to insist that whatever caused the problem is a creation of your imagination is a powerful way of getting out of trouble.
#7 They Are Demanding
If your friend places unreasonable demands on you and expects you to put everything aside when she needs you, that is a clear sign of a toxic person.
Moreover, she may demand that you spend all your time with her. Toxic friends even try to control who you date, what classes you take, and what you wear.
In addition, they may even accuse you of not being a good friend when you do not meet their demands.
Important note – if you are not in control of your own decisions in the friendship, then this is a sign of a toxic friendship.
#8 They’re Not Very Empathetic
Empathy is the capacity to understand and get a feel of other people’s emotions.
A toxic person may have trouble holding kind conversations with people due to a lack of empathy.
Also, she often says the wrong thing at the wrong time.
READ MORE: Empath vs Sociopath – Comparison
#9 They Always Judge & Criticize Other People
Toxic people simply cannot put up with mistakes or errors from other people.
They come across as sanctimonious and pious to their family and close friends but they cannot help themselves, it is like a reflex action.
#10 They Are Control Freaks
Another very common trait of a toxic person is trying to control your regular life to the best of her abilities.
A toxic person will be explaining or instructing you to do things a certain way. Obviously, these ways would be more suited to her needs.
#11 They Subtly Threaten You
Indirect threats are another common tactic that toxic people use.
This tactic involves anticipating the worst outcome possible as a consequence of your behavior.
#12 They Are Hypocrites
They have extremely high expectations for adoration, respect, and fidelity.
After the idealization phase, toxic persons will give none of this back to you. They will degrade, insult, lie, and cheat. But you are always expected to remain calm and peaceful.
READ MORE: 10 Signs of Spiritual Death
#13 They Don’t Like When You Make Decisions
If your partner or friend has ever gotten upset with you when you didn’t consult them before making a decision, it’s likely you’re in a toxic relationship.
They tend to become upset when you exercise any free will on your own, and they don’t like it when you do things without them.
David Gemmell, a British author who wrote more than 30 novels, said:
“Trust your instincts, and make judgments on what your heart tells you. The heart will not betray you.”
READ MORE: What Is A White Witch?
#14 They Tell Half-Truths
Toxic people tend to mold the truth to their advantage. They approach all interactions as if they’re in a court of law, where what they say can be used against them.
They will typically hide information that they know will expose them as liars, acting as if this is somehow better than telling a straight-out lie.
By acting in this way, toxic persons can honestly say “I never said that.” Yes, you technically never did say that, however, the method you skirted the truth wasn’t exactly correct.
READ MORE: Signs You’ve Met Your Twin Flame
#15 They Use A “Divide and Conquer” Strategy
They use this strategy to separate you from other people who do not buy into their controlling attitudes, including getting in between friendships, relationships, and family members.
Final Words
Be more aware of whom you are surrounded with, and always love yourself enough to let go of toxic people.
Images credit – Shutterstock
READ THIS NEXT: 12 Warning Signs Of A Toxic Relationship
References https://www.psychologytoday.com/things-the-most-toxic-people https://www.forbes.com/toxic-people-you-should-avoid
- About the Author
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As a founder and chief author at InsightState.com, Bulgarea Candin helps readers on their spiritual journeys. His writings are designed to inspire creativity and personal growth, guiding readers on their journey to a more fulfilled and enlightened life.
To Xic
Wednesday 20th of April 2022
Toxic people:
They're ^*$&&^%%&*__&$# !!
They can go %#&&%$%* !!
They have all the $%^&* of a big fat !@#$%^&* !!!
They never #$%^& but always $%^&* !!
They $%^ the %^& of ^&* and #$%^&* !!
They think %^* but only $%^&* the %^&* of %^&* !!!
If they *&^% they tend to ^%$&^@#&* out the back end of their #$%*&%^&^# !!
When ^%$#$%&* they $^%^**$%^ to !@#$%^&* !!
The #$%^*&^$%^ of $%^&*&^@# will $%^*&^#$@#^%$ to #$%^%#$%^&*& if #$%^^%$@# so #$^%#$^&%^ out their #$^$&*&%$# !!
and, finally,
@#^%@$&$% and #$%&^%$^% and %&&*&%##$% and $%^#@$^ you #$^%@$^*&$ !!!!!
So tell 'em to #%$%&%&$#$%^$%*&^ !!
The #$^%$%^^%@# End !!
Deepti Yadav
Tuesday 20th of July 2021
Very, true , my husband is like that only from 18 years I have been tolerating him, now, not able to tolerate anyone and Iam suffering from mild depression and high grade anxiety, I don't know what to do.
Bernadette Sanchez
Saturday 17th of April 2021
I thought this would explain someone else's personality to me but instead YIKES!! I think I am actually the toxic one here. Time to "counselor up" I guess. WOW how did I even get this way? Yuck!
B Natty
Friday 26th of July 2019
Yep I have a "best friend" like this, she isn't even my best friend she's just been around for a very long time, more than 7 years. She only show up in my life when she needs something and when she has nothing better to do. She always act as if she knows best and give crabby advice as if they're the only truth. People around her know this but they wouldn't argue back because she's just gonna make a fuss about it and it's really annoying. Slowly we just let her say what she wanna say and no one takes it seriously. She's also an control Preak, not like because she cares, simply because she wants to prove that she's right and turn crazy if you refuse to follow. Every decision I made, the university I went to, the friends I hang out with, she think they're all stupid, she think that only her friends- those rich and beautiful kids who lives an extremely easy life, are the only ones have common sense. She also judge my boyfriend because he isn't as handsome as all the boys she has known, and saying that I shouldn't date ugly people ( what??). I forgave her so many times because I know she has her own stress, but she keep crossing the line and insulting me every time we met, everything I do is wrong and stupid, when all I ever wanna do is live a simple peaceful life. And when she's bored ( aka when her boyfriend is busy and doesn't give her attention ) she insisted me to spend time with her. Even when I have my own things going on, she just doesn't care, I have to be there, I have to give her my time, she didn't even let to go home, she only care about herself. It's sweet to spend time with your friends, but what kind of friend that you can't even share your days, your emotions with because you know you gonna be insulted ? When you have someone who has been around soooo long in your life, it's hard to just cut them off, because her family like me and I like them too. But now I know my worth and set my limit. Hope anyone out there who is like me can be strong and say no.
Carrie White
Monday 27th of May 2019
This so reminds me of the evil person that married my older brother. She is a liar to the core and makes everything about herself. She constantly plays the victim even at the expense of a young man in he family who desperately needed help. She would rather my brothers real son die so that she along with her kids get more money. She went as far as to lie to the family about paternity of a child. The child is the spitting Image of her ex husband who she cheated on. The lie of the fake son ruined my youngest n we phews life because his Dad left the first family for this new family because he believed the kid was his.